In a world full of problems, be a solution! I love that!!
To look back now, & to where I grew up, in Shelbyville & Center Tx. I shake my head & think to myself, “Self, we came a long way from where we use to be, Now what are we going to do.”
Do to many reasons, to why we left, The main one is bc after the death Of my pepaw & my adopted son, I was knocking on the door of my second mental breakdown & I just WoW. I was spiraling out of control & for the life of me, I couldn’t stop myself & I Could feel me having trouble griping the concept of life. Knowing who & how I am, some of the choices & decisions I made. What was I thinking & why & the world am I not stopping it! Better yet What the Hell is wrong with me! I know I’m better than this & I know better than that. So why did I allow myself to make that choice, or let that happen. I mean Seriously!! Ya know
Anyway so to reset I had to move away. Long story short.
So I get here. Man, how different another town is. I ran into 4 of my multi split personalities & I only liked 2. This town & people taught me who I know I do NOT want to be like or around period. It has its own unique Hell & chaos of its own. Others well, their pretty cool. A little bit much at times, but pretty cool. & some just a very few that you can count on one hand. I wouldn’t trade them for the world, & I’m so grateful to have had the opportunity to be apart of their family & to be called & accepted as family.
So this feeling that I have, is seeming that whatever Lesson, purpose & journey path this is, its slowly coming to an end & a close. It’s complicated to explain, it’s just one of those feelings that you feel in your bones.
Each time I go back to visit, my family & friends who I call & consider family, living back at home in East Texas, I start to that feel pull & it’s taken affect on my emotions. I have these feeling of confliction & content. I feel subconsciously, the choice & decision has already been made, I just need to sit back, mentally, & just go with the flow & flow with the rhythm of the path, not against it, & trust me you can tell when your going against it. It has its negative, frustrating feeling. It’s not pretty ither.
I never imagined my life turning out & being the way it is but i sure know one thing. On one perspective I’m glad I did bc I loved the people that I met. I even found my soulmate & I so fell in love with him. Because we loved & valued each other, we decided to stay friends so that way we wouldn’t have to take that change of breaking each other’s heart or losing each other & that honestly was the best decision we both made.
I love my Life, & I’m really thankful & grateful. It’s interesting to spend time outside & watch nature & Gods creatures just live their life & how they communicate. It’s so intriguing! Especially this one squirrel & the mocking birds. & we though we had problems, lol yea ok! Have you ever just sat & watched the animals. If not you should it’s quite humbling & interesting. It will make your insides find humor.
So with this bipolar weather system, & today it’s going to rain. I’m going to sit back & just enjoy the beauty & the aha moments with my coffee & just be me. You know it’s going to be a good day when you have peace in a chaotic world! Have a Blessed one & Thank you for choosing & taking your time to visit my page. To go through my life’s journey with me. Your interest & just stopping by is appreciated. 🙂
There are a lot of days to where I want to write what’s on my mind. I like to write about different topics that I can relate to. I want to be able to learn how to blog. But who do you ask & which suggestion do you pick that will benefit more than not. I would also like to know how to go about blogging & writing & get paid for it, but this is my first time of ever going through this so suggestions & ideas & advice would help a lot I would greatly appreciate it.
My whole main reason that I’m starting this is because there is so much that I have to say & want to share plus along the way to be able to help people in some kind of way.
Being able to listen to people & just being there for people when they need someone the most is one of the most fulfilling & satisfying feeling one can have. It feels good to your soul to, that’s when you know what your calling & passion is. You can feel it in your bones.
Finally, After many years of figuring out what my deepest & truest passion is I’ve finally found it & I went for it 🙂
Today is that day!
When you wake up & it hits you. You realize that today is the day that you can do different. The way you think, speak & act.
You will do it without even realizing it.
You will notice a slight change or shift within yourself.
You’ll notice a more calming & peaceful innerself. Then you’ll notice the silent ripple. Then you adjust & then begin to embrace it.
Today is that day. No matter what your life looks like or where your at in life, Stop! Take a really deep down breath, then blow it out into the air. Breathe!!
Life is just that Life.
It is also called a distraction. It wants to suck & drain the Life out of you. It wants to make you feel as though you will never be good enough until..
The world doesn’t want you to know & feel what true happiness is. It only makes you want to feel that work is the only way to true happiness. But its not.
If you were to really think for 3 mins tops out of your day & reflect on & how your actions & the way you handled them. Were they good. Were they inspiring in some way, that they saw the vision or idea in the way you were talking to them?! Could they imagine or see your vision?
If not that’s ok because then that means you get another chance for a do over & this time you are going for it in a different angle. You will make it. I believe in you. & I don’t even know you, but I still believe in you. It’s all about believing in yourself as well & actually meaning it.
So with that being said, I leave you with this;
The world & what’s in it is always going to be here & be around.
But you are not.
So why not live & Do what keeps the innerside of you calm & peaceful while meeting the demands of the world & its work demands & tactics & all that fun stuff.
Don’t you think that you deserve it?
Given all you have been & are, don’t you think you deserve something for coming or living this far?!
Then why not find a way to live both. Being able to be at peace while working & living in a twisted, messed up, dysfunctional world.
I challenge you to be you, each & every day. No matter what your day looks like & consist of, I challenge you to be you & the best version of you, from here on out.
Will you accept?
Be safe out their, Be you, Be a better version of you, & just let yourself shine & Be that awesome example that you Love to be.
Most importantly Just Be You.
Have a Great & Wonderful Blessed Day.
To miss someone so deeply is like having your heart ripped out from your chest. Its very rare that you ever find someone that you have such a deep & intimate connection with but yet they are so far away. Its maddning how before the insanity started, their was a void & a deep hole & then one day, out of the deep clear blue He says Hello & every since then nothing in your world or life has been the same.
Now the countdown has begun until the day he comes home & Two will finally become one.
Hello, how are you doing? My name is Kristy & I am just starting out as a writer & I am very new at everything. I have a quick question that I hope someone can guide me in the right direction, if possible.
I would like to share my story at the same time I would like to share my inspirations & many other thoughts & writings that I have written over the yrs. I am really new at this & I don’t know where or how to begin. I have always wanted to write because writing about pretty much my experience with life in itself plus being a single parent of 2, & how I found inspiration through my journey as well & plus writing has always been a passion of mine, I just haven’t really had the opportunity to go through with it up until now.
I guess my question is How do I go about or what do I need to do to be able to write & share my story & be able to make a difference to where I can turn it into full time & eventually make an income from it. Because I am stuck & I don’t know how to go about to move forward, into making that Happen. I feel like I’m missing something but I have no idea of what it could be. I am open to ideas, suggestions, input & constructive feedback. & I Thank you in advance for your help.
I appreciate your time & your help. Thanks & Have a great day. Thanks Kristy Russell
I am a single parent raising my 2 children, my Daughter who’s 15 going to be 16 next month, in may & going through her struggles with her as she experiences teenage life years, meanwhile, learning How to manage & deal & live with ADD & being dyslexic, without taking it being on medications due to bad side effects & will refuse to take medication until she finishes high school, in 3 more yrs. My Son who’s 10, who at the moment is experiencing a new change & phase. He was also diagnosed with ADHD & O.D.D All the meanwhile, dealing with my own personal issues on top of being a single parent.
I have been diagnosed with chronic depression, PTSD, & dyslexia & it’s systematic that I’m past the borderline between Split Personality Disorder & being Bipolar. Not a good combination. Tempers can rise quickly & things can get a bit extreme. That’s why its best to Seek Peace because being peaceful & living peaceful & staying clam even through tense & unbearable challenges, the outcome is worth it. I am also a cancer survivor. For many yrs, I had been battling stage 4 Cervical Cancer & I finally has a total hysterectomy which completely removed the cancer & I have been cancer free since.
I have worked a lot of places throughout my lifetime. My recent job was a housekeeper & I loved that Job. I loved the fact that it had just showers to clean which made it so easy for me to clean. I looked forward every day to go because that was a job that I could see working at for a very long time because it was enjoyable.
Except on my really bad days to where my bones hurt me so bad that I couldn’t walk or even touch anything. My fingers would curl & twist up & extreme sharp pain would go through them. Which caused me to work slower but I still managed to work through it. Sometimes it would be so bad that it would take me 3 hrs just to move I would hurt so bad & that’s with the shower included. Dr.s still don’t know what is causing it except stress which also triggers my panic & anxiety attacks. My life is beautifully complicated & I’m extremely grateful & Blessed.
I’m also a God Fearing woman. No 2 ways about it. Like it is, & the truth of the matter is, if it wasn’t for God & His loves for us, & thinking & speaking us into existence, then there would be NO us at all. I stand Firm & Believe in Him & his word & what he says & with all that is within me. I also believe in Jesus Christ. Without his sacrifice, there would be no hope. Bc without Jesus our flesh would lead us straight to Hell. Long story short. I respect everyone & your opinion, it is a given. But I do not believe in sugar coating the truth because the truth is not to be hidden But to set you free.
This will be my first time to ever Blog & to even tell my story about my life out loud. Writing has always been a passion of mine. I just haven’t really taken the time to pursue it. So please just bare with me. Know your Blessed & Highly Favored & That you are Loved unconditionally! Thanks, Be & Stay Blessed, Kristina.